Six months is a long time to go between blog entries, but everyone needs a sabbatical now and then, right? I haven't been writing much at all for a while other than some emails. My last SGF article (one of two this year) was written in May, and I thought I'd never get it done! There are times when the ideas and words flow, and other times they barely trickle or almost dry up. This summer proved to be such a time for me. At least a couple of things played into this I think.For one, when the workload is high enough that there is little time to play, it's also difficult to be creative. In the busy season I can get bogged down and blinded by the daily grind, and that is a good way to stifle creativity. I am being taught again the importance of rest, of being still. This summer the Lord has pricked my spirit a few times with the lessons from the lives of Mary and Martha (Luke 10:38-42).
Martha invited Jesus to her home and then busied herself with "much service", while her sister Mary sat at Jesus' feet and just drank in what he had to say. Martha noticed this and tried to get Jesus to spur Mary on to help her, but he would not. He said Mary had chosen what was necessary and good, and he wouldn't take that away from her. How many of us are so much like Martha, going, doing, and serving, while all those seemingly imperative tasks rob us of listening to the Lord's word as we sit at his feet (not to mention what little time we might have left to listen to Him, we're so worn out we'll fall asleep sitting up)? "But who's going to do Martha's job if she sits at his feet, too?" you may ask. I don't know. This is what I've been wrestling with. Who will milk and feed my cows, get grandma's groceries, mow yard, etc., if I'm tuning out the world at Jesus' feet for a while? Martha's tasks seem so necessary to us, don't they? Make no mistake, serving others with the love of Christ is part of our calling as followers of Jesus. But it must flow out of an existing, vibrant relationship with the Source of Living Water. And being too taken with even something as honorable as serving can lead to a dry cup not running over. Thank goodness the Father is ever faithful to restore us when we realize our need for Him. He fills our cup and helps us see our Martha tasks don't need to be so overwhelming.
A second reason the words haven't been flowing as freely is that my noble theories and attempts at better grazing management were a miserable failure in cocklebur prevention this summer. Most of our pastures ended up with an infestation of the resilient undesirable weed again this year, which resulted in decreased grass production. We did get our broken mower repaired in order to try a different approach at combating them and have been clipping them off after the cows have grazed what grass remains. We are still working on the issue of why they're there in the first place. There is a reason for them, whether it's soil fertility issues, past or present grazing management or something else. But it has been a literal thorn in my side
knowing the grass was being crowded out, and that any we don't get clipped in time will be sticking to the cows and dog! Once again, sometimes the problems at hand loom pretty big and in this case, it really made me feel like a bit of a failure. The heat and drought this summer coupled with the cockleburs have done a number on pasture quality and subsequently milk production. The bright spot is that the milk cows seemed to handle the heat as well as they ever have other than decreased milk, but the nurse cows' body condition suffered a bit and there were discouraging numbers of udder infections in my heifer calves. So when a lot doesn't seem to be going right here, I hardly feel like I can offer offer much inspiration.But just as serving can distract us from divine communion, so discouragement can blind us to opportunities of hope. The key is in perspective, right? There is something to be learned from this trial, and there are resources out there from which to learn it. When all I can see is the problem at hand it appears to me an impassable mounta
in. But if I can step back far enough I realize it's part of the greater landscape. Most of all, I can trust my Provider, who knows all about my needs--and my cows' needs (He does, after all, keep a running count on the number of sparrows!)--to give us every tool necessary to scale the mountain. It's not beyond Him to move mountains. But if He calls us to climb it, the view from the top will be breathtaking.
